My first week of hardcore tracking and running is complete. It did not go off as planned, but I learned a lot this week anyway.
So, what happened?
Well, I tracked all the things I ate on my spreadsheet and in myfitnesspal. I saw some patterns emerging and am working to adjust those to be able to get to where I want the numbers (and my energy) to be. Positives: being more aware of what I’m putting into my body makes me appreciate the foods more and more. I really, actually enjoy eating for fuel and getting the nutrients I need, rather than solely for making my taste buds happy. I feel more empowered. Also, I guess I just make smarter choices when I do that. I like the clinical aspect of it. I don’t know, it works for me so far. Negatives: I am adjusting to fewer calories and I see a sharp learning curve…meaning I went over nearly every day. But that goes back to learning about what I need to do to make sure that I am getting the nutrients I need (mostly PROTEIN….like….I NEED MORE. And more fibrous greens. I eat a LOT of greens, but I don’t stay full nearly long enough sometimes!). Also, SO MUCH WATER IS NEEDED. That is tough to reach sometimes, but with the running, it has basically been a necessity.
So, food is going pretty okay. Working on different recipes and meal plans to get where I want to be. I will say that I rarely feel crappy and sluggish after meals anymore, and that is an awesome change.
Running, though. Ugh. Man. I love the idea of running. I love the look of going running. I love my running clothes. I so, so hate running right now. I got shin splints after my long run last week. So, I did 2 mile intervals on Tuesday, then a 4 mile slower run on Friday (because Thursday was so cold). Then, and I think this is where I messed up, I tried to do a 2 mile interval run on Saturday, to make up for my lost day (I usually run T/Th/Sa/Su). BAD. CALL. Really. I got 4-5 cycles in before I felt the most ridiculously awful stabbing pain in my shins, on both sides of the bones. This is, sadly, not an unfamiliar feeling, either. I got shin splints when I first was training for my first 5k in 2015. I couldn’t run for nearly a month (and then promptly twisted my ankle after I recovered from my shin splints…or right before I got them…I don’t remember but it was an awful few months leading up to that fun race). I don’t want to have to wait that long this time to keep running. I know that shin splints can be caused by overworking the muscles, so I am efforting to decrease mileage significantly (as in, this week is mostly walking) as well as incorporating stretching and lower-impact cross training, so that I can still use my legs, but not kill them. I will not sugar coat this: it really sucks. I don’t enjoy pain in my legs. I don’t want to drag my sister and brother-in-law down (again) at the half in April. I wanted to train hard and do way better than last time. I am already super disappointed and worried that I’ll do worse. I don’t like being the weak link, and even though I was avidly trying NOT TO BE, I will be, again. And it sucks. I got some biofreeze today for after my long soak in the tub. I got some aspirin, also, since ibuprofen isn’t even taking the edge off. I feel like a mess. I feel disappointed. I feel disheartened. I feel like I should quit running.
I’m not going to quit running. While I really feel like quitting now (and at so many points in the past, also), I think that I would prefer to get past all of these awful feelings and terrible training days and stupid injuries, and get to the point where I am a good runner. Where I go on runs and just do them. I want to be able to run 3.1 miles straight without stopping (and in under 30m). I want to be able to run and enjoy it. And if I quit, I will never get to that point. I really want that. I want that more than I want to quit. I want that ALMOST as much as I want alllll the Disney medals. I want that as my running legacy (even for myself), not quitting. I already have a trail of many things I’ve quit left behind me…I really don’t want this to be another.
Thankful? For kitties and ice packs. Both comforted me a ton after the run today. Sweet snuggles while my legs scream in pain. Made me relax quicker. Love them kitty snuggles.